Category: Blog

In my experience being seen and held in a space of love allows healing.

The events of the past few weeks have been overwhelming. So much tragedy and pain.

My altar has remained the same:

Divine Mother- this is one of the many images of the mother I love. The divine mother holds and loves. I sit with her to remind myself that I am held and I hold others. I am loved and I love. I am whole and when I feel this to be true I am giving others permission to know their wholeness.

The World- I have a glass globe. It lets the light shine through.

A piece of fallen wood from a virgin forest in the smoky mountains- Connecting with the ancient forests of my homeland allows me to connect with my ancestors who lived here so long ago.

We all carry the gifts and trauma of our ancestors within us and they determine so much of how our lives are lived.

A stone heart from the shore of Corsica- my youngest child found this and gifted it to me. This heart reminds me to open mine and keep it open no matter what.

I am an empath. Part of what that means is I feel others feelings as my own; both when I am with someone and also when many, many people are feeling strong feelings, I feel that as well. Not knowing what to do when those feelings hit me can be and is overwhelming.

In my personal practice I create a space through ritual where I know I am safe and can allow the pain and despair that is flowing to me from others to open and lay bare my own personal pain. Allowing this to happen also conjures up sometimes long forgotten/suppressed memories of pain. Sometimes there is no story to explain the pain, just the emotion rising. I focus on my altar and the objects upon it to keep myself centered in the present ( when strong emotions arise it is easy to fall back in time and get lost in the hurt) and to allow the feelings be felt and the person I was then to be seen and embraced. I hold space for My Self and in doing so I am holding space for all the others that are hurting.

May we all have the space necessary to hold our Selves in love.

May we ease the suffering.

May we heal the wounds.

One of my regular practices is a daily altar ritual. I usually set up my weekly altar on Sunday, feeling into the energy of the week and what I want to focus on.

This week we have the first new moon after the Total Eclipse. She is in Virgo and is already showing her power. She brings more change and the need to flow and adapt. She also reminds us of our deepest most painful wounds that want to be acknowledged and nursed.

It is also September…. All the energies of our personal year are intensified and brought clearly to the surface this month.

And it is the Autumn Equinox. A time to celebrate harvest, honor balance and give thanks.

Radical change is in the air… do you feel it too? Read More…

I am beginning to come out of the listlessness. The past 2 weeks have consisted of going to work, coming home, eating and then going to bed to Wake in the early hours to do the same thing over again. Keeping my routines of Qigong and meditation has kept me sane, but unfulfilled. No desire to cook, no inspiration to write or paint or plan my garden or any of the multitudes of creative endeavors I usually enjoy. I put it off to simply being “fruehjahrsmuedigkeit”, German for the lethargy at the beginning of spring. It may also be the frustration of not being able to connect with my muse, my genie, my brilliance.

Or it is what it is. Read More…

Willingly and enthusiastically accept and support the totality of who and what you are;  those inner selves that are not who you truly are, but were created at some point in the past to protect your deepest values and gifts at all cost, the inner selves that are still living in the belief they are not safe.

It took a near death experience, and the resulting deep seated peace within me, for me to compassionately embrace my not good enough and frightened self, the one not daring to be who she fully is for fear she would be shunned or worse.

The months and years following that accident brought ever changing situations/conflicts  into my life that sometimes made the new emotional baseline of peace within me very quiet, as if the volume was turned down on the once all encompassing state. These situations would trigger/ reawaken the old feeling of “It’s not ok to be me”.  I would feel (and still do) an anxiety and tightness in different parts of my body, that would become louder if I did not or do not pay attention to it. Most times the simple act of paying attention to the discomfort would be (and is) enough to ease the tension and anxiety and let peace take its place again. Sometimes it is not enough, and I must allow myself to sink within, be curious and compassionately seek out and embrace the inner me that is causing the discomfort. Read More…